Tony Robbins says that love is the oxygen of the human soul, and he is spot-on! It’s
Tony Robbins says that love is the oxygen of the human soul, and he is spot-on! It’s why I wrote my book, The List Method – the science-based way to find the love of your life. I am thrilled to report that nearly everyone I know who has read the book has found love and is incredibly happy in their new relationship. It really blows my mind! What’s more, is that most of them read the book but by their own admission, did not actually do the workbook, AND IT STILL WORKED! Just reading the book and absorbing the information was enough to focus their attention and call the partner of their dreams into their experience. Deep down, everybody knows what they find most attractive; it’s just usually locked inside the subconscious where you can’t access it. Reading the book helps create the clarity that activates the law.
Sadly, there are also those who read the book yet still can’t meet anyone. Those are people who have subconscious barriers, old beliefs, and outdated views that block their desires and keep them from moving forward. It breaks my heart. They have no idea why they can’t seem to meet anyone they find even remotely attractive. These subconscious barriers are blind spots for them, and they are unaware that they are blocking their own path to happiness. When something is below your conscious awareness is very difficult to do anything about it.
Here is the issue that we all face - so much of our life is subconscious. The life we think we are living only takes place inside our own heads. Shockingly, we see only about 1% of the world clearly, and 99% of what goes on around us is pure conjecture of the mind*. We think we see the real world, but we just keep meeting our own beliefs over and over again. Our fears and beliefs are based on our experiences, interpreted inside our mind; mixed with our confirmation bias, they create those barriers of which we are barely conscious. We think we know what we want in life, but what’s holding us back from getting it is subconscious. Whenever we are not getting what we want, one thing is for sure: there is a corresponding subconscious belief that is blocking it. Of course, we have no idea this is going on; the only thing we know is that things aren’t moving forward for us.
At any time, you can look around and see something in your life that you don’t like, something you’d like to change. Don’t feel bad; it doesn’t mean your life sucks. In fact, this divine discontent we all feel is the basis for all evolution and improvement on this planet. We feel some type of negative emotion that drives us to investigate what’s wrong, and then we’re motivated to find the solutions.
But here is where the rubber meets the road. Once we’re aware of a problem, the big question is, what do we do about it? Of course, there are those who straight away visualize a desired outcome and forge ahead to find a solution. The majority of us, however, aren’t quite that focused. We’re fixated on the problem, wallowing in it and complaining about it with little progress, sometimes for years. You want to go to the gym, but you don’t. You want to go on a diet, but you keep eating donuts. In other words, we are hijacked by circular thinking. So, when you find yourself ruminating about everything that’s wrong in your life, and you’re beating yourself up about all the things you should be doing but aren’t, or even if you just find yourself staring off lost in space, it means that it’s not you who is running your thinking; your thinking is running you. In other words, something other than you is in charge of your destiny, and what’s in charge are your fears, your beliefs, and the barriers to your happiness.
The problem is that when your subconscious hijacks you, all the best self-help advice in the world doesn’t help you because you can’t do anything with it. By definition, you don’t have the ability to take conscious thought or action in the area of the subconscious. It's like you’re underwater, being tumbled along by the current. It does underscore the need to have a List, not just for finding the love of your life. You should have clarity about where you want to go in all areas of life so that even when you’re unable to take conscious thought, at least you end up somewhere in the vicinity of where you wanted to go. Clarity activates the law even if you’re not around for it.
Abraham/Hicks likens life to a river. When you are going with the Flow, it feels wonderful, and everything comes easily. When things aren’t going your way, however, it means you are swimming against the current. Not only are you working way too hard, but you also won’t end up where you want to go. When you’re caught up in the turmoil of negative thinking, there isn’t much you can do. It is, however, an issue that needs to be addressed because, unfortunately, we tend to drive where we look. By this, I mean that your primary energetic frequency creates your experience of the world. Negative energy and thinking will always take you where you don’t want to go.
So, while you may not be able to take much conscious thought, there is one simple question you can ask yourself: am I going upstream or downstream? Right now, in this moment, am I going with the Flow or against the current? Am I blaming, shaming, or thinking about how wrong and stupid everyone is, or am I feeling blessed? Without pinpointing specifics – which you can’t do in the subconscious – this much you can figure out.
Everything you want is downstream; it is a result of going with the Flow. If your inquiry tells you that your thinking is upstream, there are simple ways to turn your boat around: Take a deep breath. Turn on some music. Get up, stretch, and hop up and down a few times. Take your eyes off your cell phone or your computer for a moment and look outside. Expanding your view long-distance releases serotonin in the brain. Think of an area in your life where things are working that be actively grateful for it. Or simply put a smile on your face, even if it feels weird at the time. All these are simple, scientifically-proven strategies to change your state and expand your energy on the spot, no matter where you are at the moment.
Make this simple inquiry a habit. Awareness of whether your present thought is upstream or downstream has a tremendous impact and, over time, can permanently uplevel your energetic state. Life takes place inside our heads, and your experience of the world is entirely subjective. As you change your energy, your experience of the world changes with it, and you might just find that, overall, things are heading your way much more often.